Psychoanalitic theory is dead... so how does that make you feel?

latent_manifest @ 2006-11-27T13:24:00

2006-11-27T20:24:37Z

I typed this last Tuesday, so it is in reference to the dream I had last Monday night. I put it as private so I could write out the symbols which is a new thing I am going to try on here:

Last night was a good one. It started off with me as the main character and ended as someone else, almost like a movie as a main character. I remember it starting off on campus, but it wasn't quite RCC. It was a combination of RCC, UCR, and UCSC. I was walking and I see that they are handing out free beer. Actually for all you RCCers Ali Isa is handing out free beers. I think that's weird but pay no mind. I see Tom B. and walk toward him but then he is Brenda instead but this is of course not weird that he just shapshifted. So I tell her there is free beer and then then there is a blur but then I am back by the free beer booth. There's a man with a snake around him. I walk by the man and inbetween two large stone walls, very similar to the fountain that used to be near the small theatre/lot 6 at UCR. There are all kinds of snakes on the ground here. This is the second time I'm walking through the snakes, the first time I think was somewhere in the blur. So I'm just walking in the snake area for the second time, hoping none of them are poisonous and as I do the snake man is behind me and tells me none are poisonous, and I think I was kind of holding myself between the two walls with my feet off the ground cause I remember lowering myself and then as I took a step the man said except that one, which that one then bit me. The snake held on for a very long time and I was asking him to take it off or what ever and he said just to leave it. So I asked questions like when it was last milked -which he didn't know- and how likely I was to die and stuff. Then there is a blur. This is where it turns movieish. The snake guy is like, in love with this professor. He is slightly mentally disabled and spoke slowly and with a kind of unintellegence to his voice. I'm sad this part is so much of a blur cause it was so long (seeming like half an hour) and it was really sad and touching (or so I remember when I woke up and thought "I have to remember this dream"). I remember him saying he was gonna cut off a piece of his hair or something for this woman as they were embracing -I think because he wanted her to remember him and for some reason they couldn't be together. I remember it being me at that part though, but still third person and still as the snake guy.

When I woke up that first time, I seriously thought that I could make a movie out of this dream. I don't know if that was the disillusion of being half asleep which made me think it was good, or if it was the cloudiness of remembering that made it bad.

I think maybe Isa was handing out the beers because I think he is kind of a jerk to his students, especially his female students so him handing out beers is him contradicting himself because he is a health teacher. Plus I once saw him play music at a bar.
Tom and Brenda are the same cause I always see them at the same time at school.
The snakes are me being unsure about the nerdom and money spending of starting to play Magic the Gathering again. I had the idea to make a snake deck just hours before I went to sleep that night.
I'm not sure why I am phasing in with this mentally disabled guy, but I think he was in part caused by Lennie from Of Mice and Men because I was talking about how much I dislike Steinbeck earlier that day, and Lennie is one of my least favorite characters of his, and the one I think about when I think about disliking Steinbeck.
This guy was definitely me because the professor at UCR reminds me a lot of my friend who I am unsure where we stand on friendship. Why I was In love with his mother? I don't know. I also know it was me cause I talk about cutting of my padawan braid and giving it to my grandma/Tyler/Rachael, and the hair he was going to cut off was a piece off the front, like I used to have when I would pull half my hair back.

latent_manifest @ 2006-10-26T11:27:00

2006-10-26T18:33:56Z

I had a dream I got the letter Rachael sent out last week, but it wasn't a letter, it was the t-shirt she told me she making me. It was this like, green shiny thing with a yellow collar, assumedly made from a non-conventional material. But the thing I didn't realize it was a t-shirt at first, nor that it was from Rachael. I thought it was a prop or decoration of some sort without the return address. I came to the realization of what it was, liked the shirt, and realized it wasn't the shirt I thought she was making for me.

Okay, anticlimactic I know, but my dreams haven't been much as of late, and I figure I owed this journal (and it's four readers) SOMETHING.

latent_manifest @ 2006-09-25T23:44:00

2006-09-26T06:50:05Z

So I had I guess what you could call a nightmare. I had a dream Lindsay died. Now, in real life, I haven't been able to to cry in over ten years. The dream had a whole scene where I was battling myself to let the tears out, trying to remember how. Her funeral was, of all things, a pool party at her house. I remember not knowing how she died, and in an odd, almost lucid way, I knew I'd find out later in the dream, but I still believed the dream was true, if that makes sense. I woke up still believing she was gone. It was the worst dream I've had in a while.

latent_manifest @ 2006-09-20T08:15:00

2006-09-20T15:28:37Z

Last night I was on a train going somewhere, not sure where, with a bunch of people. My bed was on the train and I was in it along Lindsay and someone else. Lindsay and I had found Katie Nelson's cell phone and were looking at the pictures. That's pretty much all I remember there.
I had another dream where Tim and Rachael and I were on the beach. It was a cross between Venice beach and Balboa. We came there seemingly many days sucession. My mom owned an accordian and I lent it out to some guy on the beach. I remember just looking at everyone there. There was a guy doing pommel horse on some play ground equipment. He was pretty good, he was going for a good long time. We were under a big sun umbrella and it started to rain. I didn't notice till I saw what I at first thought waas sweat dripping from the pommel horse guy. It was raining pretty hard. I then said "Woah, I didn't realize it was raining, you guys can use the umbrella too." But then I realized that I was asking Rachael and Tim, two of the most likely people to play in the rain, if they wanted to not play in the rain. My favorite part is when I was at home on the computer and Rachael came to my door and my dad asks me when she got back (from Santa Cruz) and I at first had no idea what he was talking about. I think that's the only dream where I've ever had to think about what someone said to me to understand it I always just understand. I told him that she was down for the weekend, and he laughed (cause it's far to come for the weekend I guess). Then we went to school, in this world, she had started RCC with me before she left to Santa Cruz, and so while she was back she went to the music fundamentalss class we had together. We were going over the F major scale when I woke up.

latent_manifest @ 2006-08-07T12:27:00

2006-08-07T19:27:59Z

Last night Sean and I road the rails. We hopped a train and road out to what would have been like UCR area/Box Springs Mountain, but was more like Highgrove area. So anyway we were on the back car of a train that was going backwards so we got a front row seat. We were sitting back to back with our arms linked and I faced forward and Sean backward. The train actually went really slow so it was especially enjoyable. After a while, the train kind of vanished and we were just floating above the tracks back to back but we didn't notice that a train had dissappeared. We floated aboove backyards and through old childhood memories of railroad tracks that are were never re-identified through adolescence, but obviously still exist in my head as I called out to Sean "I knew the tracks went through someone's yard!" as a small cocker spaniel mix litterally nipped at our butts and a woman watched in wonderment as we floated over her fence the same way one might drag a yo-yo over a small wall so that it hits it and while your hand moves forward the yoyo move up the wall until the hand is far enough away to make the yo-yo swing back to under the hand. At this moment I notice not that the train dissappeared, but that we are probably floating down the old location of the railroad tracks and the ones in place are slightly South. So we step off of our floating and start wondering the industrial part of town we're in while admiring the graffitti and we see the tracks. Suddenly Tina's there but she's dressed like Katie and we're singing Death or Glory by The Clash headed for the track to catch a train. That's where I woke up.
I think I'm begining to understand the latent content of my dreams a lot better. It kind of helps me with goals. Even though they usually don't teach me anything new, they do give me ideas of what needs attention.

latent_manifest @ 2006-08-04T14:23:00

2006-08-04T21:24:08Z

Let's see what I can remember...
Not last night but the night before I went to San Diego it was full of symbols and funny thing I actually understand most of them. See if you can do the same, that is if anyone still reads this. I think I was with my family (in San Diego you know). Well anyway there was this girl there and were were staying in this thing that was more like an appartment complex. Anyway I guess I was in love with this girl and for some reason we were not allowed to be in contact with eachother, so I kept like climbing this latter to her window where her air conditoner was. I don't remember ever contacting her, just seeing her and the process and the planning, if you will (hint: symbol). So I's climb this ladder and I was so high up and everyone watched and I emember once the ladder fell and I just grabbed the air conditioner and hung then dropped from it, and it was like 10 feet up only (it had seemed closer to 25 ft [equivalent to a third floor window]). So then I guess I was overlooking the city with my old babysitter and then she I guess is going back to Riverside so I ride home with her in the back-driver-side seat, and she is in the back middle seat, driving (somehow). So we get to Riverside (symbnol, as well as San Diego) and were over by the brown's hose but it's more like farm land instead of houses, and the street is raised. Then She drives/crashes down the embankment ino someones orane groves and so we go to the front gate and the people who live there come up and the parents are signing at their deaf son (symbol) and their other son was talking to s and we got the car out and then there all these people (symbol) I know just TOtally congregating on Pine street kind all walking one direction. Then Jon came up and stated talking to me. I think that's about where Iit ended.
Woke up with a song I couldn't identify in my head and forgot it bfore I was able to google it.
Funny thing, what I understand of this dream I already kinda knew, so I suppose tha it doesn't help me much to understand it, maybe a little bit I suppose.

latent_manifest @ 2006-07-06T13:06:00

2006-07-06T20:08:13Z

I dreamt I had chocolate covered pretzals. About ten ten pounds of them. White and milk.

latent_manifest @ 2006-07-04T11:58:00

2006-07-04T19:58:15Z

So here we are, back again. Last night I was downtown with some people, it was day. The Browns were there, Jon, Jish, and some others as well. I don't remember quite why we were there but we ended up all chiling by the statue of the Korean man that no one remembers his name. So we were there for a while, and for some reason we needed to get rid of Jon's guitar for a while. So I manufactured a device to make it sail away and the extreme weather conditions would eventually get to in a couple day and it should be back. Then as it was going up I realized that it may not come back in a place where we could find it, I didn't say anything however. So as this contraption is going upwards it slams into one of the high buildings in downtown Riverside (like, I'm talkin' high) and broke the guitar and contraption, but then suddenly Jon was on it too, and he clung to a piece of the broken balcony and a man came out of his door (which had a fancy hotel-like number on it) and helped him up and another came out of his door and made a very blatent expression (blatent enough to be seen from as far down on the ground we were) of "Holy crap this is high to be up here with broken railing." I think he then went in and Jon gracefully swung over the hole in the balcony the crash had created as if it were two feet from the ground and he was in no danger. I remember thinking that there's no way we could get him down so instead I got up to help him find his way out from where he is (I still don't know how I did it, but at the tiem it was of no concern to me. So we are in the hallway inside now and like, there's a couple guys by the elevator that ask us what room we are from (as if they often have problems with people who are not guest at this place [which I am curretnly discovering is a hotel] entering at the 40ith floor and riding the elevator to the ground and leaving). One man asks what room we are from, so instead of explaining I just said seventeen and the man gets this slightly stunned, slightly apologetic look on his face and asks "are you the president's son?" then, unusre of how many children whatever president (America, some corporation, etc.) he was talking about had, I said "no I am the president's daughter's girlfriend-er the president's daughter's boyfriend." So they would assume that Jon was the president's son. So hey escort us somewhere and everytime we see an exit we try and dash for it, but they keep us there because of who we are. We got caught then the next thing I remember is being at a resturant aprrently with the people who I was pretending who my family is and I remember thinking to myself "It sure is strange that we still haven't run into the people whose kids we are" it was like one of thos extremely circumstantial movies and we only ran into people who weren't fully sure what the kids looked like, and anyone else who would know, just didn't take notice of us. A girl was now with us, I think it was Hanna that was pretend to be Claire, the president's daughter, and the only person who we were pretending to be that we actually knew the name of. So we make another dash for a door and I gues I am the only one who makes it out cause next thing I remember I am outside looking for the door I exited from, but the doors all look dfferent from the outside than the inside so it's tough. I then run into Chelsea Brown and she tells me that Stephen has a "real" piece in *uncomprehendable word(s) art show. I ask what about three times and it's not more clear any of those times so I continue on my quest to save Jon and Hanna. I suddenly remember it was probably Mario's and head over. Then on the way I woke up, and wanted to go back and finish, but it was too hot so I just got out of bed, it was 11:30 anyway.

latent_manifest @ 2006-05-31T22:34:00

2006-06-01T05:46:21Z

So the other night Ben Lauchang came back and wanted to go backpacking with me and someone else (I don't remember who) to some spot he wanted to show me. So he had me use this very awkward like 11 foot long pack that I thought was gonna drag on the floor but ended up fitting perfect. So we went out to tis spot which ended up just being like, under a freeway bridge. It reminded me of the unerpass at Van Buren for the bike path. So then I was in this area that looked a lot like the area off the head of the bike path in Fairmount park. I was there I think by myself, but then Kelley was there, then I asked her to cut my hair and she ssaid okay. Then there way this girl who I noticed was pulling her shirt down at me and showing me her mini mouse bra, and I remembered seeing her do that earlier, apparently during the backpacking trip (which I guess was over by this time). I then heard A.K.A. Gangsters by the Specials and was awake.

latent_manifest @ 2006-05-01T22:22:00

2006-05-02T05:44:56Z

So heres how it is. I pretty much got bored of posting my boring dreams in hear which I'm not even sure get read. Well anyway I'm posting this one because it was especially strange and I want to remember it.
First, a tiny bit of background:
I spent all weekend carving a plaster sculpture for my sculpture class. And you see when one spends twenty hours in just three days carving plaster it kind of consumes one's mind. Everything from wanting to smooth out every imperfect curve you see, to constantly thinking about getting rid of the little bugs that are attracted to the moisture of the plaster. I also speant a couple hours with the browns, Josh, and the Raga twins last night talking.
So in this dream I was like talking to Ivan and Justine, and they were on this bed that was kind of a bed and kind of the desk/cd player/stereo that Chelsea has in her room. The whole time this took place I was like, trying to mentally shape the bed/thing into an aesthetically pleasing shape. I was keeping in mind I could not add, but only subtract from this ~~plaster~~, I mean bed. Then Ivan started talking about his crabs (or rather the bugs on the plaster) and we were talking about how they spread and how they would be worse for a girl. I woke up a couple times and kept dreaming this in a kind of monotonous, but not quite repreatitive dream.
The things my mind comes up with.

latent_manifest @ 2006-04-03T13:54:00

2006-04-03T20:54:20Z

This for all ou down-towners. Anyone here know Mouse? The quiet guy with the matted mess of hair (looks kinda like flaps over his ears) and a beard that coems down in two long dreads. He rides the bus all the time and is always moving his hands in a specific OCD/Turrets-like manner. He never ever talks except he sometimes mumbles to himself. Well anyway if ya don't, that's Mouse.

So in my dream I belive I was at the terminal and there was Mouse standing there stroking his beard like he does, and there was this other man, a clean version of mouse who spoke eloquantly and even had a top hat. He explained to me about Mouse and how he was his twin and how he lives of Social Security and thers where he gets busfare/food money.

latent_manifest @ 2006-03-02T10:46:00

2006-03-02T18:46:22Z

Woah
Lots last night.
The first, as I remember, was a party at Alison's house, I don't really remember much about it, except that a couple dreams later I realized that Alison hadn't even been at her party, then, still in the dream I felt bad cause no one noticed she wasn't in attendance at her own party. What a bunch of selfish bastards.
I then had a strange dream that there was this girl who when asked what Ben Wa Balls were proceeded to drop trou and show everyone. There were a lot of girls there with really fancy fishnets and corsets and stuff. Strange dream that was, not in the slightest sexual however.
I also had two separate involving my uncle Paul. In one of them I think he was on the news, like, falling into a glass window and hurting himself really bad, but then it turned out to be fake news, but then he was really hurt. In the other one, possibly connectdnow that I think about it, he died and it was pretty much sucked. I don't think I have ever felt that much anxiety in a dream before.
I thought the wierdness of the dream was due to my being sick like a dog, and the anxiety I had about not having the time to study very much last night for my test and discussion today. However, it turns out my uncle called at about 4:10 last night. I didn't wake up, but that would definately be a possibility of the anxiety in my dreams, the reason for him being in them, and the all-around wierdness.
I woke up this morning and have had vertigo all day.

latent_manifest @ 2006-02-18T14:34:00

2006-02-18T22:42:50Z

Last night Tom was driving about and he had like $240 on him which was supposed to be for the fountain fund. So were in the El Camino and we somehow know we're gonna get robbed. Kind of like we got pulled over by gangsters. So I tell Tom to gimmie $200 and I grab it and shove 100 in my mouth/swallow and they see me so I bolt but I guess it was right by my house so I shove the other 100 in my pocket and run home. So I'm like at the toilet trying to spew this 100 but I can't get it to come up. I'm sticking my whole hand down my throat and it isn't even gagging. It was cool cause I was sticking my hand down my throat, cutting off any air passage and then pulling my hand up so as to create a vaccuum and pull the money (and anything else) up. Totally crazy, I was scared I'd scrape up my throat and like do something bad to it. I think what happened is the whole bodily function/sensation in dreamstate thing. Like, where you can't do certain sensations or functions in your dreams unless they're trivialized. I was still attempting to get it out when it ended.

latent_manifest @ 2006-02-11T12:33:00

2006-02-11T20:33:50Z

An old dream came back to me today. I was at some fancy place, kinda like the Mission Inn (only less implied mischeif) seemingly an event of sorts had just ended. Kelley was there, and she was like, sleeping under a table, slowly waking up. Pasami was there with Ili (even though I've never met either of them in person, and never even seen pictures of Ili, and don't even know there relations, the name just stuck in my head the day before I had this dream) and I was like "Hey! Kelley's here, you know her from Livejournal!" Instead of saying "You know me from Livejournal" ...
So I lift up the table cloth and instead of waking up Kelley I start waking up.

latent_manifest @ 2006-02-11T12:17:00

2006-02-11T20:17:53Z

My mom got me a cell phone.
I was conufsed.
She said she got worried about me...

latent_manifest @ 2006-02-11T03:02:00

2006-02-11T11:03:32Z

I dreamed I smoked pot.
I think I was at Coffee Depot.
Inside.
My mom was there.
Possibly putting me up to it.
I don't remember it having an effect different than sucking through a straw.
I DO remember that I liked to watch the pot burn and try to coal it evenly.

The phrase "sneak a toke" rings a bell.

latent_manifest @ 2006-02-03T00:08:00

2006-02-03T08:18:46Z

So last night I'm with Tim.
You know those Candy dispensers thry have at various places?
Not the like Wal-Marty ones, more like the ones at Back to the Grind.
Well anyway Tim sees one (somewhere) and decides he wants Mike and Ikes.
Trick is, he apparently doesn't want any unless they're from one of thos old dispensers.
Oh, and he only wants red ones (but not Hot Tamales).
So we go to a couple car repair places and end up in a laundrymat.
I then woke up.

I also remember Ben Lauchang and someone else in the military were back, by chance at the same time. But I think that was unrelated.

latent_manifest @ 2006-02-01T02:07:00

2006-02-01T10:48:43Z

Back Attack!
Did anyone else ever say that?

So I had this wierd dream. (Is that even necessary to post?). I was like down the street at this house I used to have water wars at and I babysat there a couple times. I also learned about roof-hopping and being sneaky on their sundeck. It was also, strangely enough where the man's house was in this dream. So, just as in that dream, the house was quite different. So it's one of thosee deals where the stairs are outside and it's two houses: one on each floor. So like, I'm trying to get in, actually I think I was trying to break in, to this upper story. I think I was doign some scenario deal, kind of like water wars, kind of like paintball, except I had no gear or anything. So I can't get in cause this house is like lockes up real nice. So I decided I'm gonna try the bottom story. I look inside and it's all like super fancy with chandaleers and big screens and whatnot. I see Tara Tjosaas inside on the computer. So I walk in through the window/hole in the wall (wtf?) and am like creeping through but then decide to say hi and I tap Tara on shoulder and sneak around and she stands up and likes yell at her brother for fooling her or something then she sees me and we say hi. I keep moving and see this dude watching the huge big screen with Taylor her brother, and it's my 11th grade math teacher! He asks how I'm doin' then I wake up and think "that's not where Tara lives, I've been to her house." Then I was like oh yeah, dream.

Who would fall in love with a chicken with it's head cut off?

2005-12-19T11:59:48Z

It's crazy how my ("concious") brain will fight my sleeping brain. Like I had this dream where I was in the fellowship hall for my church, eating of course, cause that's what you do in a fellowship hall. And there is this dude with a blue shirt with white stripes, like mine. He also has a blue on white "Hawaiian" shirt over it (unbuttoned) and blue and white hibiscus patterned shorts. Now, I am wearing my blue shirt with white stripes of the exact same print (in real life as I was sleeping, and in the dream). Now, in the dream, this guys is like, real cool and like, gave me this shirt so I am thinking about how he gave it to me, and how he likes it in stuff. But as I keep comming to this thought in the dream, trying to remember where the shirt came from and I am allowing the similarities between our clothes, but thinking "naw Jason gave me that shirt" (which he did in real life). My brain is like battling itself between the truth and the construct test (what I believe dreams to be). I find this fascinating. Whether anyone else got this far or even reads this I don't know.

latent_manifest @ 2005-12-14T11:24:00

2005-12-14T19:30:02Z

Bit strange, and I don't remember much but here goes:
I remeber that there was like a party, and we were all little kids. I think there was like some way to liv, over again. As in start back from really young. Maybe it was a temporary thing or somethingI remember talking to kids version of Jon and saying "Why doesn't anyone do this thing, it's so cool." I remember Mat Coleman walked in and like, everyone was being loud cause though we were mentally older, our child instincts were taking over (a.k.a. we were loud as butt). I remember I went down stairs and there was some people I knew (don't remember who) watch this architypal black video game player who was like really cool, but really uninhibited and loud. He was playing some Mario I had never heard of. The I like stole a fence from my house and climbed my little fig tree to hide (what?) when I tricked my dad.

I've been having dreams about church youth activities, strange...

2005-12-03T18:53:44Z

But let's not start there, lets start with a funny short one two nights ago. A bunch of us were in the (my) alley, I think with Tom's truck, doing stuff we do. I don't rightly remember who all was there, only specificly Casey. We were lighting a "flint bomb," or rather Tim and Casey were. So it heats up, red hot, and Casey comes over to me and talks to me but has the flit bomb in my face. I'm like "dude, get that out of my face" So then he starts to taunt me with an insecurely held 300+ degree piece of metal in my face. I was like "what a dick." Interesting dream that was, as Casey probably wouldn't do that, but I know why I had that dream, but to avoid offending anyone, I'm gonna keep my mouth closed.

Okay now last night's dreams:
I don't remember much, but I do remember we were having a youth event at my church (I still go to those sometimes, cause those kids are cool). Billy was there, and his friend Elisa too (who I met last night). Anyway, I guess it was a birthday party for someone who was brand new to the youth group. Anyway, I guess the masses (kind of selfishly) decided it was not worth staying so like, autonomously, everyone rushes out, evryone is pushing through like wow and I'm like "hey guys, were knockin' people over, aren't we better than those ravenous walmart customers?" Then when we're outside the youth pastor comes out and is like "I bet *name of kid whose birthday it is* had real good birthday, and has a really good impression of the church" or something less sarcastic. That's it.

Then I was awake for like twenty minutes, I walked around, crapped, you know how it is. Then I went back to sleep.

Another youth dream. There was some event, I can't remember the setting too well (or anything else, my memory since the begining of this entry has failed me). There was this girl Jessica who I see once a year at a church event that went/goes to north and is on myspace. Anyway, the door to her house is like stage right of whatever is happening and she keeps getting in trouble. Okay I didn't really remember much, I'd be surprised if anyone still reads this.

Edit:the song playing (see below) reminded me a bit more of the last dream. I guess the band was Gogl Bordelo, but I thought it was Polyphonic Spre, cause they both have a billion people on stage at one time, and the both dress funny. I just wanted to add that in, cause I'm a nerd.

latent_manifest @ 2005-11-18T10:07:00

2005-11-18T18:29:31Z

So last night we were all hangin out at Bryant at night. Like we do. We start headin' outand some dude pulls out from round the corner. He seems like he's not a cop but he seems like he might be something else so we decide to pay attention to him. I dunno what happens but I end up at his house and Ryan Urak was there somewhere. I guess I was looking for him. So his house is like a four story apartment but each story that's above the ground has a door on the outside of the building and a like walkway comming from it. So anyway I'm climbing the walkway and it's super rickety. I run into Ryan on the third floor and we talk for a second about the shadey almost scaffolding. I ask "So who is thguis guy." He replies "He kind of looks like a Jolly-Man, so they call him The Jolly Man." So I guess I go down cause I'm on the second floor stair landing again and I see the Jolly Man. I ask him what his deal is, he like tries to coax me into staing, but I see no reason to unless he tells me he's a cop or brings up some blackmail. I say quite loudly "Fuck no!" and some chick walks up from the side of the walkway and was like "not this again *mumble*"(I couldn't understand his name) So he is coaxing me to stay and I take these green shoe thingies off my feet (cause I guess I can't run with em or something, or maybe it was cause he was massaging my feet, I know that's why I took off my (ankle) brace. I say "I may have a sprained ankle but I can still jump this" so I do and land only on my right foot and limp run away. I knew he'd follow and I knew he'd get in his truck so I knew Ryan was good to escape and I know my neighborhood (his house was a block away) so I can just cut through yards and stuff. But I end up not being able to find an escape so I hide in a garden. Then I woke up.

I'll Understand If You Don't Read This Legnthy Entry, Though I Can't Say I Don't Want You To.

2005-10-28T20:40:36Z

Last night was a bit restless. I was in a fight with my own pillow which cause quite a subconcious frenzy.
I can't remember where it all began because it ended around 12:30 and must have started around 5:00 cause it was all choppy. So let's just say SOMEHOW Trisha Tom The Sean maybe Casey Tim and me are in this like back room for a store. I think the people who run it are still there. SO basically we're takin' a huge risk chillin playin' Mario 3 in this store. There's like a door in the floor where I guess leads down to where they keep stock and we keep getting stuff from it. We also get soda and stuff from the next room over. I never went there though, so I don't know what room it was. Eventually the lower room I guess started filling with water, or something large spilled or something, so they though we had to go to the next room, but they were wrong, I could still get stuff. So we chill there for a while randomly (this was actually the bulk of the night, but I can't remember it very well) and Tim and I leave. We're riding home and as we pull in to Tim's house his dad opens the door and sees us. But Tim was supposed to sneak in the back I was like "dude your dad just saw us I'm gettin outta here" and he goes "ah crap my dad's up, I was supposed to get him up a 6:50" (or something that was to that effect, but implied it was about 6:50AM). So make tracks and leave Tim to his maker. I seem to remember jetting off back toward the storey type place. But I may have gone home and got my dad's BMW (motorcycle, for those of you who don't know) and riddin' off toward said place. So over on Fairmount and Houghton there like this party, and at 7:00am it's still jumpin', musta been some party. I stop just out of congratulations and Tim wants to check it out (that's right he's back with me somehow) so we do. I park up on the side grass (even though there's like plenty of parking, I don't know where the million people inside came from cause normal amounts of cars were outside). So we go in no problem, I was all nervous they wouldn't let us in. So yeah we're inside got some kickin' toons on, I thought it was a band but some chick tells me I shoulda heard it earlier and I realize it's just music on major shuffle. So Tim or the third person that's with us who I know is a guy but that's all I remember points out the something or other shots (alcohol is always mumbo jumbo cause I don't know anything about types of alcohol) so there's like two left. I go up and take one like a hardass (I think only Sean and Tim would get why I might do that in a dream). So then there's this loud drunk chick, you know, the one at every party, and she is like in her bra bein' a drunk white girl. So I go over for like 12 seconds, laugh, and start walkin' away. I think that's when we left. Somehow we end up on my side of the block and my neighbor overhears me say something I needed to do, which turns out to be a big part of the dream but I have no idea what it was I needed, but it seemed pretty important at the time. So after hearing me, she says she knows someobe who can hook it up. I know who she means, and she's a payphone (tightwad) so I'm reluctant but say yeah anyways. Now I don't remember going through my neighborhood on foot and I remember a car ride somewhere in the dream and this is the only place it fits so I guess it was here. My neighbor turns into some other generic 34-45 year old and drives us over to payphone land (which appears to be somwhere between Arlington Ave. and Arlington area). So we get outta the car near my grandma's old house. My pants keep falling down at this point and I decide I like em there so I leave em. We cross arlington which was a little busy (at this point it is still dawn, so make of time what you will). We walk a ways and end up at the payphones house and was like 'crap' and pulled my pants up right quick. Anyway her lights aren't on, and since she's a payphone we don't go over and see. At this point I think the group consists of me, Tim, my neighbor, maybe James?, The Sean, and I think Mitch randomly enters here, if not a bit earlier. So we are right in front of this dude Matt's rental. A mix between Matt Hossfard and Matt from LA. It's up on the third floor of this kind of shiesty building. So I say we all have to go home and sleep (it's still perpetual dawn) and that we always get caught up playin Mortal Kombat at Matt's house so we need to jet, but what I really cared about was I didn't want my neighbor to come in and see my friends do something not too gracious and blab it, as she is somewhat of a payphone herself so I'm just tryin' to get her home before she starts gettin' info for stories about me. The whole pants things though didn't seem to make her mind much. I was also worried my dad motocicleta might be in danger at that party. Sadly this dream ends here.

latent_manifest @ 2005-10-26T08:23:00

2005-10-26T15:30:01Z

One thing I forogt from the last entry. It happened like the night before it or something.

I had, for the second time in my memory, a dream where I was someone else. Last time I was still kind of myself, but also kind of Alex from Clockwork Orange. This time I was less myself (thought I still had Erik's though process, duh) and the person I was, was a woman. What's crazy is it was like a sex dream. Soooo wierd. I woke up a bit confused, but then again I always wake up confused.
Now, I don't feel embarassed by this dream, I just see it as my brain working out what it considers possible situations. Although I did feel I had toput this disclaimer...

latent_manifest @ 2005-10-25T09:49:00

2005-10-25T17:01:06Z

A couple old ones and a new one:

The other night I was sleeping in my living room again and tranfering between realities, it caused for some strangeness, the funniest of all I was sure to remember which was I was over by the boathouse and I was chasing somone or looking for someone, I don't remember who, I only remember it was a girl. I guess there was a lot of people with whoever that were also hiding. So I look around this bend and this is where the logic starts to mix. Aparently if you are thinking of a group of people more than three, and you say "et all" then the other dissappear and are represented by the one person you were thinking of first (kind of like MLA format).
Same night but mor logical Tom and I drove (in his old Regal Laura) to some scool, possibly Frremont. There was this tiny little track and he wanted to run it so we did. It was like ten feet across the long part of the oval. Something wierd happened like someone was watching us or something, it's hard to remember that long ago.
I can't remember the begining but I do remember Rachael, her mom, and some other random people (I don't think they had faces) at RCC. We all wanted to go somewhere so Rachael mom is like "let's take my car. So everyone starts piling in and her mom opens the back and gets in next to a bike, then Rachael does too. I don't remember what I did, I probably sat on the bike or something wierd. Who knows who was driving. That's again all I remember.